A letter to a granddaughter from Grandma, or to a grandson from Grandpa

A letter to a granddaughter from grandma can be one page and still be the thing she keeps. Here are six examples for granddaughters and grandsons, from one grandparent or both, plus what to put in and how to seal a letter for a day years from now.

An example to start from

To Maya, to open on her 16th birthday

Dear Maya,

You are eleven as I write this, and you have just beaten me at gin rummy four times in a row. I let you win once. I want that on record.

By the time you read this you will be sixteen and the world will be loud. I hope you still feed the neighbor's cat through the fence when you think no one is watching. I was watching. I am proud of that girl.

Be kind to your mother this year. She was sixteen once too, and I was not easy about it.

Grandma
An example to borrow from. Make it yours.

How your letter stays yours

Private by default. Only the person you address can open it.
Delete any time: before it's opened, after, or everything.
Nothing is public unless you ask, and a person reads it first.
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A grandmother reading a picture book to a toddler on her lap
Photo: dassel on Pixabay

What to write in a letter to your granddaughter

Start with one small thing only you know. A story from when she was two. The way she says a word wrong. What she was doing the last time you were together. Specific beats grand every time.

Then say what you see in her. Not what she should become, but what she already is.

Add one thing about you that she may not know: where you grew up, a job you hated, a mistake you got through. To a grandchild you are often just Grandma or Grandpa, and the person underneath is worth meeting.

End with what you hope she does when she opens it. Call you, laugh, keep going, take a walk.

Letters to borrow from

We wrote these to show what a letter like this can sound like. Borrow a line, then make it yours: the small, true details are what make it land.

To Eli, for the day he gets his license

Eli,

I taught your father to drive in the church parking lot and he hit the only lamppost. Do not tell him I told you.

You are nine and you still think a car is a rocket ship. When you read this you will be behind the wheel for real. Check your mirrors twice. Leave your phone in the glove box. Call me instead of driving tired. I mean any hour.

Now go slowly.

Grandpa
An example to borrow from. Make it yours.

To Camila, for the morning of her wedding

Mi Camila,

I am writing this at the kitchen table where you learned to roll tortillas and got more flour on the dog than on the dough. You are fourteen. You have not met them yet, whoever they are.

I was married at nineteen in borrowed shoes and I was terrified. Here is what I know. Marriage is mostly doing the dishes and still liking each other. Laugh at the same things. Say sorry first, sometimes. Eat dinner together.

I will be the one crying near the cake.

Abuela
An example to borrow from. Make it yours.

To Lucy, for graduation day, from both of us

Dear Lucy,

Pop says to tell you he cried at your kindergarten graduation and he is not ashamed. Nana says to tell you she did not cry, and that is a lie.

We are writing this together on the porch. You are twelve and you want to be a vet, an astronaut, or a person who runs a bakery, depending on the day. Whatever you walked out of school today to become, we are already proud of you.

Your drawing of Pop with the very large nose is still on our fridge. It is staying up.

Nana and Pop
An example to borrow from. Make it yours.

To Theo, to open on a day that went badly

Theo,

If you are reading this, something has gone wrong, and you are probably in your room with the door shut. I know that room. I sat in one like it in 1968.

Here is what I would say from the end of the bed. It will not feel this big next month. Eat something. Go outside for ten minutes, even if it is raining. Then call someone, and if you do not want to call someone, call me.

You are a good kid with a good heart. Today does not change that.

Grandpa
An example to borrow from. Make it yours.

To Aisha, from a grandmother far away

Dear Aisha,

I live nine thousand miles from you and we have met four times. That is not enough, and I will not pretend it is.

So I am writing the things I cannot say over a bad video call. I keep your school photo by my bed. I know you hate your braces. I loved your laugh from the first second I heard it on the phone.

Open this when you wish someone older would say it is okay to be thirteen. It is okay. It is hard and it is okay.

Nani
An example to borrow from. Make it yours.

A letter to my grandson, from one grandparent or both

Everything above works for a grandson. Write the way you talk to him, with the same jokes. Skip advice he has already heard. A letter that says I enjoy you lands better than one that says be good.

A letter to a granddaughter from grandparents can be one page signed by both of you, as Lucy's was above. Or write one each. Two letters let each voice stay itself, and a grandchild gets to hold both.

When should a grandchild open it?

Pick a moment, not just a date. Good ones:

  • when they turn 13, 16 or 18
  • when they graduate
  • when they get married or have a baby
  • on a bad day, for the one you will not be able to predict

Each letter stays locked until the date you set for it. Every Open When letter also has a date that you choose, and it stays locked until then, so nothing is read too soon. Pick a date a little after the moment you are aiming for.

Getting the letter to them

A young grandchild has no email, so the simplest route is to keep the letter for now and hand over the private link or QR code yourself when the day comes, perhaps tucked inside a card. Or leave their email and they get a message saying a sealed letter is waiting. The email never contains the words.

Choose a wax seal color (Letterbox red, Ink blue, Fern, Ochre or Plum) and a handwriting style (Everyday, Neat or Round). Add one song as a link if there is one you share. You can unseal and edit the letter until it is opened, and you can download your own copy. For a letter that waits many years, keep that copy somewhere safe too.

Questions that help you start

  • What is the first thing you remember doing together?
  • What does she do that nobody else does?
  • What was your life like at the age she is now?
  • What do you wish someone had told you at thirteen?
  • What are you proud of that she may not know about?
  • Which family story only you can tell?
  • What does she call you, and how did she come to call you that?
  • What would you like her to do on the day she opens this?

Open When never writes your letter for you. These are only here to get the first line down.

Questions people ask

What should I write in a letter to my granddaughter?
Write what you would say across the kitchen table. One small memory, one thing you admire in her, and one piece of your own story she has not heard. Keep it to a page. A short, specific letter is read twice. A long, general one is skimmed.
What do you write in a letter to your grandson?
The same things, in your own voice. Mention a day you spent together, tell him what you noticed about him, and say one thing you got wrong at his age. Humor helps. Skip the speech and say that you enjoy him.
How old should a grandchild be to get a letter like this?
You can write at any age. A letter sealed for 13 or 18 suits a child who is little now. A child who is old enough to read can open one this week. You can also write a few, each sealed for a different moment.
Is it morbid to write a letter for later?
No. A sealed letter is a way to say what you mean while you can. Write it as yourself today, with today's jokes. You can unseal and edit it any time before it is opened, so it never has to be finished in one sitting.
Does a letter to my grandchild cost anything?
No. It is free to write and free to read, and no account is needed. An email address is optional. Leave one if you want the letter delivered by email, or keep it for now and give them the link or QR code yourself.

More letters like this

Some things are easier to say on paper, and better kept for the right day.

Write to your grandchild