Each one opens a blank letter with the moment already on the envelope. No account needed.
Mia,
On Saturday I told you your job was "basically a hobby," in front of your sister. You went quiet and I pretended not to notice. You work harder than anyone I know, and you were right to leave early.
I'm sorry. Not because you were upset, but because it was cruel and it wasn't true. I'd like to take you to dinner and listen, if you'll let me.
People often type "apologize letter" into a search box, and what they want is a letter that says sorry well. It is simpler than it looks. To write an apology letter that works, keep to these parts:
Keep it to one page. A short, true letter beats a long one that is mostly about your guilt.
We wrote these to show what a letter like this can sound like. Borrow a line, then make it yours: the small, true details are what make it land.
Luis,
I said you never listen. That's not true. You listened for three hours when my mother was sick, and I forgot that when I was angry.
I'm sorry for what I said, and for how loud I was. Next time I'm going to ask what's wrong before I decide what you did.
Priya,
Your move-in day. You asked me to carry the one heavy box and I said I'd be there at nine. I didn't come, and I didn't call.
I have no good reason. I was embarrassed, and then it was a week, and then it was a month. I'm sorry I made you carry it alone. I miss our Thursdays.
I don't know where you are. I don't know if you'd even remember. I gave you a nickname in the cafeteria that I won't write down, and the whole table laughed. I laughed loudest, because I was scared it would be me next.
You didn't deserve it. I'm sorry. I think of your face when my own daughter comes home from school.
Meera,
I skipped your wedding rehearsal and told everyone it was a work thing. It wasn't. I couldn't be in that church after Dad. I let you think I didn't care.
I'm sorry I made you carry my silence on your week. Can we talk, just the two of us, at the house on Sunday?
Greg,
In Tuesday's meeting I presented your idea as if it were mine. Nobody corrected me, but you were sitting right there. I've told Jan it was yours, and I'll say so again at Friday's review.
I'm sorry. It was careless, and you deserved better.
Dad,
I said I wished you weren't my father. I was nineteen and angry and you were standing in the kitchen in your slippers. You didn't answer. You turned the stove off.
I've thought about that for fifteen years. I don't know if you remember. I'm sorry I said it, and I'm sorry I never took it back.
With a partner, the apology has to be specific. "I'm sorry for everything" reads as "I'm sorry for nothing in particular." Name the night, the thing you said, the plan you forgot.
Do not make the letter about how bad you feel. They need to know you understand, not that you are suffering. Do not put the blame back on them in the last paragraph, and do not send ten messages in an hour. One good letter, then give them room.
If you can, say it out loud as well. A letter is a good opening and a poor ending. The examples below include a few for a girlfriend and a boyfriend that you can borrow the shape of.
A friend usually needs less than a partner and notices more. Be short and specific: what you did, that you know it hurt, that you miss them. If you have been quiet for a long time, say so. The apology for the silence is part of the apology.
An apology letter to someone you hurt is different when they may not want to hear from you. They might have asked for distance, or the hurt may be old. In that case ask who the letter is for. If it is mainly to relieve your guilt, keep it unsent. If it could give them something, such as an acknowledgment that what happened was wrong and was not their fault, think about whether they would want it.
An apology letter does not have to be sent to be worth writing. Keep it unsent when the person has asked you not to contact them, when contacting them would reopen something painful, when they have died, or when you are not yet sure what you are apologizing for and need to find out.
An unsent letter has no send button and no address. You can fold it and keep it on your own shelf on your device, where only you can see it, or let it go and it is deleted for good. If one day you want it to reach them, you can turn it into an Open When letter. Writing it can help a little: it makes you say the thing precisely, which is a large part of an apology.
If you do send one, send it once. An apology is not a campaign. For related letters, see letters to an ex and goodbye letters.
Sometimes a short message is the right size: for a small hurt, or as a first step before a letter. The messages below are shapes to adapt. Heart touching sorry messages for a girlfriend are not the long, poetic kind. They are the ones that name the actual thing you did. The same goes for a boyfriend, a friend, a parent or a coworker.
A short sorry is not a way to close a large hurt. If you broke someone's trust, treat a short message as the knock on the door, not the whole visit.
Open When never writes your letter for you. These are only here to get the first line down.